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The Adventures of Deadly Lampshade: Part IX - $blog = int(rand(@thoughts));

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July 16th, 2004


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05:10 pm - The Adventures of Deadly Lampshade: Part IX
By this time, Charlie had finished giving Chewie the grand tour of our luxurious and spacious front porch, his new crate (Chewie's, not the husband's), and, probably most importantly, the ten-pound dog food dispenser and water dish. I would have expected the dog to go absolutely nuts about that much food.

Regardless of all I'd read on the infamous rec.pets.dogs newsgroup, I was a bit leery of the whole "free feed" idea, since all the dogs I'd ever seen were perpetually starving. In fact, all the dogs I'd ever seen would likely wolf down all ten pounds of food without stopping to breathe and then turn around to the next unsuspecting passerby and put on the "Oh, GOD I am STARVING! I am a poor starving puppy! Oh feeeeeed me, FEEEEED me" act without batting an eyelash.

Chewie surprised me a bit. "Watch this for a minute," Charlie said, grinning, as I came back outside to see what they were doing.

As we stood there watching, the dog walked slowly over to the food, took one piece in his mouth, walked slowly over to his crate, lay down, and leisurely crunched it to bits. After a moment, he got up, again moseyed on over to the food, took another piece, wandered back to the crate, and crunched it up in the same, almost delicate, manner. He then sauntered over to the water dispenser, took a few drinks, came over to us, and looked up at us calmly, his tongue lolling out of his mouth happily.

"Come on, let's go inside and show him the house," I told Charlie. "We might as well find out if he's housebroken as soon as possible."

Charlie started for the door, opened it, then paused. "What about Boggs?" he asked, with a bit of uncertainty.

Uh oh. I'd almost forgotten about Boggs. In my wonder and joy at having rescued at least one of my strays, and the thrill of adopting a new dog, it was, perhaps, no surprise that Boggs had slipped my mind. Actually, my mind probably didn't particularly want to think about Boggs in context with the dog, for various reasons.

Yes, we'd definitely made a potential error in judgement. With one thing and another, we simply hadn't reckoned with Boggs, the Giant Cat. Boggs was the same Giant Cat, by the way, who even now was waiting inside the house as we prepared to take the new puppy inside.

This could get ugly.


...
To be continued ...

(4 comments | Leave a comment)

Comments:


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From:mrsveteran
Date:July 16th, 2004 05:22 pm (UTC)
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Best. Comment. EVAR!!!111

hahahaha!!!

*dies*
From:citizen_gkar
Date:July 16th, 2004 05:28 pm (UTC)
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*raises shields, readies deflector array*
From:crumblebum
Date:July 21st, 2004 03:27 pm (UTC)
(Link)
I have a cocker who eats exactly the same way.

I am very much enjoying this story, Missus.



~the bum~

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