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May 10th, 2006

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04:56 pm - Interlude: Dog meets Boss
The last company I worked for was pretty laid-back in a lot of ways. One day, we were talking about how some other dot coms let their employees bring their pets to work with them, so when I mentioned that we should do that, the boss said, "Sure! Bring him in!"

The next day, I packed up Chewie into the car, and set off to the office. Everyone loved him. He was so cute! One of our engineers got right down on the floor and started talking baby talk to the dog: "Does he like the tummy scratchies? Yes, he likes the tummy scratchies!" All in all, Chewie was a big hit, and he reveled in the attention as dogs so often do.

Now, there's one small problem with taking a dog somewhere that is not your home, and that is the whole "house breaking" thing. House breaking (or house training) a dog has a lot to do with smell. The dog basically learns that this particular collection of smells is "den" and other particular collections of smells are "outside." Dogs mostly understand "den" and "not-den" and while they can learn that this other collection of smells is also "den," well, you do have to sort of let them know that.

I found out about this problem when I took Chewie into the boss's office. While I was talking about something or other in the new software, Chewie placidly turned around a few times, snuffled around the floor, and took a very matter of fact dump in the middle of the room.

My boss and I just looked at the dog. Then the dump. Then back to each other.

My boss cleared his throat as I stood there, caught between utter horror and the almost-irresistable desire to laugh.

"You know," he said, "A lot of people have given me a lot of shit over the years." He paused for a moment before continuing, "But never quite this literally."

The laughter won.

(8 comments | Leave a comment)


[User Picture]
Date:May 11th, 2006 12:13 am (UTC)
[User Picture]
Date:May 11th, 2006 03:23 am (UTC)
I need to post more stories about that company. I have another one that's also pretty funny that I just remembered.

Bad ol' Chewie.

[User Picture]
Date:May 11th, 2006 04:08 am (UTC)
Marcos "threatening" the ibm consultatants at the picnic thingie?

The office space incident?

Guard pulling a gun on the crazy cat person?

Myron driving at night, while its snowing with his head out the window, and getting pulled over after running over the curb?

The day of nerf warfare?

The night we discovered the other office had its internal network routing to san francisco and back before going out to the net?

The dozens of customer service department reps calling each other up "to train" how to handle a customer call for months because we didnt have any customers?

The day they introduced a guy as your position, with you in the audience not being told beforehand, and then going on to discover he had lied on his resume and wasnt qualified?

Im going to blame you if I have ptsd.

[User Picture]
Date:May 11th, 2006 01:00 pm (UTC)
I was thinking more of "Here's your sign," but some of those are good too.
[User Picture]
Date:May 11th, 2006 12:32 am (UTC)
Please, please, please collect your stories into a book and make lots of money.

I just snorted a kiddie vitamin I was laughing so hard.
[User Picture]
Date:May 11th, 2006 03:23 am (UTC)
"Kiddie vitamin?"


Yeah, I just need an agent.
[User Picture]
Date:May 11th, 2006 01:16 pm (UTC)
heh heh. I took bowie into work once last fall... he was pretty good, no pooping/peeing anywhere, though my office is split into 3 'offices' which are basically large room with several desks and a bathroom. each office is off a big outdoor pario. So he really only interacted with the people in my office, which I'm sure has a lot of my scent in it.
with 2 doggies now, however, I don't see any future visits. :lol:

and yes please, more nutty work stories!
[User Picture]
Date:May 11th, 2006 08:05 pm (UTC)
i love mrs v posts.

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