Log in

No account? Create an account

$blog = int(rand(@thoughts));

Hello, and welcome to my LJ profile, info, whatever-the-hell-you-call-it page. Have a seat. Make yourself comfortable. Coffee? No? Okay then.

It's all true. No really! Would I lie?

First of all, you should know that everything I post on my blog is based on a true story. The people in my life are fairly interesting and amusing people in their own rights, however, I would be remiss if I didn't say that in some of these blog entries, I may (how shall I put it) stretch the truth, just a tad, for entertainment purposes.

I may write as though I found something extremely irritating, when, in fact, I didn't mind so much but being irritated at it makes a better story. I may write as though one of my friends or family members didn't understand something, where, in fact, they understood it perfectly well, but pretending to not understand that they understood it gives a good sound bite.

So, in other words, sometimes, and just a teensy bit, I lie. Part of the fun is in guessing which parts are stretched truth for amusement purposes, and which are the God's honest facts. If you guess, you'll most likely be wrong.

That's the kind of people I hang out with.

Cast of Characters

bahhumbugeffers or "Charlie": In several of the stories, my husband. Currently, ex-husband.

sushirob or "Rob": My best friend

banshree: Rob's wife and my other best friend.

Nick: my brother

Taylor: My nephew, Nick's son

Mom & Dad: my parents. Big surprise there, huh? As a side note, Mom and Dad have been divorced for several years, but are best friends. I think their relationship is stronger than maybe it ever was when they were married, actually. They just don't live in the same house. Which is good, because Charlie and I sold our house and moved in with Dad when he underwent some serious medical stuff (including open-heart surgery) a few years back.

These are mostly the recurring characters, although every so often some others might slip in. For example, il31415li who is my amazingly intelligent, witty, and insightful Internet Penpal. He may show up later on if I can get his permission to use him as a character like I do Rob.

Make sure to read the comments

Oh. OH! And this is important: a lot of times, I've found that the comments are the best part of these entries, and in some cases, escalate the whole blog experience into heights of comedy that I could never attain all by my lonesome.

So you should really at least skim the comments, and if you have something funny, witty, or whatever to add, feel free! I do allow anonymous comments, but they're screened, so feel free to add your humorous contribution anonymously if you're the shy type.

In conclusion:

I guess that's all for the welcome. Kick back, and I hope you enjoy your visit.

Standard LJ friends list policy/disclaimer/whatever

Anyone is free to add me to their LJ friends list at any time. Doing so gives me tacit permission to add you to my LJ friends list (or not), just so you know. :-) Unless I do know you, it's probably going to be "or not."

This is mostly because I suffer from a chronic illness which causes me a lot of pain and occasional grumpiness. I try to keep my public blog entries upbeat and occasionally funny and/or entertaining, while the friends-only entries (such as they are) consist mostly of me whining about my health, that new drug that makes me black out unexpectedly or causes me to see double whilst my hair comes out in handfuls, insurance woes, unspeakable medical procedures, and personal crap that probably barely interests my actual friends, although they're kind enough to pretend it does.

Trust me -- you probably don't want me to friend you back if you don't know me. There's enough whining in the world without you having to read mine. :-)

I am nice. I am a niiiiiice person. Don't you want to be my friend? Of course you do!